Screening

To be able to adopt you need to go through a screening process. This is to make sure that you are ready to become parents. To make sure you are not making a rash decision based on feeling without thought. To ensure that if a child is placed in your home they will be loved, cared for, protected and looked after.

And so you start the process:

• Couple interviews.
• Individual interviews.
• Group sessions to discuss topics such as ‘how to tell your child they are adopted’.
• Home visits.
• Handing in a large amount of paperwork to show that you do not have a criminal record, you are financially able to care for a child, reasons why you want to adopt.
• You have to get three important people in your life to vouch for you and explain in their words why they think you would be fit as parents.

And only if you get through all of this are you put on the list to become adoptive parents.

I was happy to go through the process because a part of me is a meticulous planner who likes everything in order. It makes me feel good to sort out all our paperwork, fill it in, hand it in, and find out it was alright. Like handing in an essay and getting a good mark back. I like to tick the boxes. A part of it is the “faith by works” understanding. If you do enough good things, God will reward you; if you show them what a nice person you are, they will give you a baby.

I was also self-righteous when going through the process. I kept thinking, “how is it that I have to jump though all these hoops just to be able to adopt a child, and there are people falling pregnant all the time without anyone to watch up on them”. I felt enraged that teenagers with no money, no prospects, and no space for a child in their life could fall pregnant so ‘easily’ in a one night stand. I found it irresponsible that people with no money, proper job, or way of looking after their child could make the decision to fall pregnant, and the child would have to deal with the consequences. 
Why was there no “pregnancy readiness test” or “parents license” that you would have to get before being allowed to have a child?

Both those parts of me I have had to work through. Grace from God is UNDESERVED FAVOUR. It does not matter how much you do right, God gives because He loves you, not because you did something for Him. And if grace is extended to me, grace is extended to all. Who am I to say that a child will not have a life full of love and support, just because I don’t agree with their parents’ life decisions? God can redeem any situation for the good of those who love him. 

And so I lay aside my pride, and my works. I am so thankful to be able to receive the blessing of a child. I am thankful that God has given us such a quick and positive screening process. I thank Him for his patience with me and my sinful thoughts, and for the grace He throws into my life. The favour He gives me I do not deserve. The love He shows me I can scarcely believe. I am starting to feel the Father’s heart in the love that is stirring in me for a child I have not met. I child I have no connection to, no genetic tie, no relation, no bond. A child that is nameless, faceless, and parentless. All I know is that whichever baby God has handpicked for me – that is MY child.